I could avoid it no longer, the time had come, there was no skirting around the question this time, no vague answer and quick change of topic- NO, the time had come.
Tom: Mum, is Steve Irwin real or just a man dressed up like Waggs The Dog is?
Me: *deep breath, loud exhale* Steve Irwin is a real man... kind of... not just dressed up.
Tom: Can we visit him when we go to his Australia Zoo?
Me: Well, we won’t see him because he’s dead.
*silence*
It was like explaining that a loved one had died. And more than that, I had to explain what DEAD meant. Very hard. You can see why I’d been avoiding it. He actually took it quite well and in a very practical 5 year old way he even grasped the stingray poke in the heart bit. Anyway, the conversation continued.
Tom: So who’s looking after the animals at his zoo?
Me: Bindi.
Tom: Oh. *pause* Is Bindi dead?
Me: NO, No no, Bindi is looking after to zoo.
Tom: Is Bindi’s mum dead?
Me: NO. Everyone else is still alive and living at the zoo. Bindi, her mum and her brother, Bob.
Tom: Bob the Builder?
Me: Well, no, Bob the brother... and he’s not dead either.
Then, weeks later, Tom was watching ‘Bindi the Jungle Girl’ on TV and there was footage of Steve diving and looking at sea snakes and Tom asked if this was the bit where he gets poked in the heart by a stingray. So I’m glad I put some thought into my answer because he’s been thinking about it and mulling it over. They remember everything we say, and believe it, OH THE RESPONSIBILITY! Their vulnerability and the way their sweet gullible eyes look up and soak up all they hear from the one they think knows everything... breaks my heart.
One day they’ll learn that I’m just making it all up and learning as I go.
So, Steve Irwin explained. Done. I can tick that off my list. Crikey.
